Last weekend I attended the wedding of my two close friends, Sarah and Adrian. The service was beautiful and the reception was a fantastic time – I really couldn’t have hoped for anything better for two people who truly deserved a great wedding.
Naturally, after a night of non-reflective dancing, and drinking, and general good-times, I found myself thinking over the following the next day:
1 – In some ways, being married is like being single. Both are commitments and both are in some ways non-negotiable. I found it sort of strange that the people who could change dance parters at will were the married guys (who are already taken) and the single guys (who are well, single). Since I fall into the latter category, perhaps my perspective is somewhat skewed on the former category, but personal bias not withstanding, I think wedding receptions prove the old maxim that “some commitment is better than no commitment”. Following this line of thought, one could say that dating is a kind of pseudo-commitment that could be terminated by either party at any time. That kind of ambivalence towards the future makes dating, I think, more inherently unstable than the married or single options. Hence, my new love maxim “commitment is freedom”.
2 – Unrelated to the wedding, I’m having all kinds of personal anger issues these days. My emotional reaction to everything from finding my housemate in the bath when I need to take a shower (small problem) to my love-hate relationship with my now almost year-long “temp” job (bigger problem), to my grandfather’s death (biggest problem), is to get mad. And seriously, I’m not a person who gets mad about anything. The good news is, though, that I’ve chosen to look at this emotional sea-change as a good thing. I’m embracing my anger, but I’m also trying not to take it too seriously.
3 – Somewhat related to point 2; I’ve discovered that a good way to overcome personal obstacles is to declare whatever problem I’m having a goal. For example, when I forget to buy groceries for supper the next night, all I have to do is tell myself that I was trying to set a “cooking challenge” to see what I can make with the 5 ingredients I have left in the pantry! Instant success! I think more people would be happier if they approached difficult circumstances in this way (look at the president – he’s been doing this for 8 years and he’s all smiles on TV!).
4 – I’m really neglecting this blog – so much so that I now number different ideas within a single post. It’s pathetic really. I’ve got a lot to write about, seriously. And I want to share. But I just haven’t been in the mood – I blame the weather.
5 – One thing about my life now, post-college, is that I know how to really ENJOY the things that I like and how to really AVOID the things that I don’t like. That part of adulthood is proving useful.
